Brian Billick does not beat around the bush

If you can remember, Manny Ramirez missed a game a few months ago because he was suffering from "intestinal turmoil". At the time, I praised Terry Francona for his ability to use such refined language because most of us would have just gone with "violent, ass destroying diarrhea" instead.

Well, Ravens wide receiver Derrick Mason is the latest player to get a case of the shits, only his coach doesn't really sugar coat it like Francona did...

Wide receiver Derrick Mason sat out with an unusual ailment, according to [Head Coach Brian] Billick.

“He’s got - as Tess [trainer Bill Tessendorf] says - gastroenteritis,” Billick said. “In my neighborhood, that’s [diarrhea]. So you put whatever label you want to.”

I choose the add the label of "colon ripping diarrhea", something that the young gentleman pictured above is experiencing for sure. That's the kind of diarrhea that makes you pray for sweet death because the agony is too much for your sphincter to handle.

* Kudos to Larry Brown for this great find.